January is likely my least favorite month of the year.  It is knee-deep into winter.  Some days we have snow, some rain, but rarely do we have sunshine.  The daylight hours themselves are still relatively short, but we ARE making our way towards spring.  It is a dreary time of the year and I feel it.  My body feels sluggish.  My mind screams for carbohydrates and other comfort foods.  Even Jaxon seems to have more down-time during the day than his usual.

I am four months into the Strongest You Coaching (SYC) program.  It has not been about weight loss.  It has not been about inches lost.  It HAS been about strength training, nutritional habits, and mindset.  It has been four months of “Ah HA” moments.  

I have lost weight before.  I have lost inches before.  Every time, I vow to stick to “the program”.  Every time I swear “this time” will be different.  Every time, I gain it back.  Every time.  Obviously I know HOW to do the work.  So, what the heck?

I as a nurse and personal trainer, I am no stranger to the strategies required to change body composition.  I know how the body functions.  What I did not realize is that I have been making it far more complicated than it needs to be, and I have been creating ongoing barriers for myself.   Through SYC, I am learning better strategies for “what” and “how” to manage my fitness and nutrition.  The biggest lessons I am learning is how to shift my mindset regarding ALL of it.  THAT has been my Achille’s heel in the past.  Ah HA!

I am learning to avoid labeling foods as “good” or “bad”.  That translates to avoiding labels for myself as “good” or “bad”.  That further translates teaching myself to compliment rather than condemn myself.  I am learning to actually coach myself, as I would coach another… with caring, patience, and compassion. Ah HA!  

I am experimenting with food choices, learning how my body reacts to it.  Sometimes I do really well with it and I feel GREAT.  Sometimes I do not so well with it, and I feel like CRAP.  Either way, I take note of it and move on.  I have learned that the scale and measuring tape are tools that only provide numbers and are not very useful in the big scheme of things.  Ah HA!

I am learning to feel hunger, and be okay with it.  Sometimes, when my emotions are a bit more uncomfortable, I still find myself using food as a buffer, searching for satisfaction in flavors or textures, rather than dig in to the heart of the issue.  I recognize it.  I accept it.  I move on.  Ah HA!

I have learned to trust my coach.  I follow my training program as written.  In the beginning, I was skeptical.  I criticized the program as not being “hard” enough, or it did not make me sweat long enough, and then, of course, it would just not “work”.  I have learned a new way to train.  I am learning to exercise in a way that provides my body enough stress, but not too much stress.  I have increased my mobility and I move better.  I have gotten stronger, without injury, and have set personal records in my deadlift and squat… two exercises that in the past, have led to low back pain and injury for me.  Ah HA!

Overall, I am learning to lean into situations that cause me discomfort, and let them be.  I know that the only way I will change is to change   I know that doing what I have been doing year after year does not work long term for me. I am learning to change my mindset FIRST and my habits will follow… eventually.  I will change the things that are not serving me well and keep the things that are.  I will continue to be willing to try new strategies.

I am not done yet.  In some ways, I am just getting started.  

Ah HA!