It has been an exceptionally long time since I have written.  As I sit to write today, my brain is a whirlwind of activity and I am not sure how to start.  Last week, my sweet boy Jaxon was sick.  I will spare you the gory details.  He did not eat for four days.  He did not drink for two days.  After veterinary care including subcutaneous fluid, special treatment for his gut, and coaxing from a dog-whispering friend (thank you Aunt Mel), he finally started to eat on Thursday.  He has steadily improved and is getting back to his usual feisty self.

I have been a nurse for over 30 years.  I can deal with the challenges of illness and injury, offering support and care to someone who is suffering.  If caregiving were a sport, I would win a gold medal. I do not do so well with sick pets.  I think it is the fact that they cannot communicate or provide feedback as to how they are feeling.  My heart breaks as I feel so helpless. 

This past week I was on high alert.  I did not sleep because Jaxon did not sleep.  When I did not sleep I was too tired to exercise.  I had thoughts of pets I have loved and lost over the years.  I do NOT balance my stress well when it comes to sick animals.  I got through the week feeling frazzled and exhausted.

I last year I read a fantastic article by friend in fitness, Julie, at Saltwater Fit.  In the article, she shares an image of all of us having a bucket full of energy, joy, creativity, etc. We leave parts of ourselves here and there as we work through our day with job, family, illness, society, and so on, and our bucket becomes depleted.  She further shares that we have activities in our lives where we feel AMAZING, and when we engage in those activities, we have the ability to refill our bucket. You can read the full version of the article here.  It is worth the time.

Where am I going with this?  The short version is that I have been walking around literally spilling the contents of my bucket out everywhere I go.  I have made some changes in my life over the past month.  I have spread myself thin.  I have not been taking time to refill my bucket.  When Jaxon was sick I literally dumped out my bucket and rattled it noisily through my days.  Not good. 

As I write, I am taking time to breathe.  Today I will take time to reprioritize, and shift some things around in my week.  I need to create the time to do things that refill my bucket. I need to exercise and move my body.  I need to take pictures and tie flies.  I need to write as it gives me time to reflect.   I need to regain my sense of balance and recognize that it is okay to slow down the pace. I need to refill the bucket.

Spring is in the air.  The bird song is changing.  The snow is FINALLY melting and the grass is showing in the yard.  I have tomato seedlings sprouting for the garden.  Each day in this life is truly a precious gift.  Each day is an opportunity.

It is time to refill the bucket.